The many faces of pre-race anxiety

One of the reasons I wanted to run a 50 mile race is because the idea of running 50 miles scares the shit out of me. So it's not shocking that I'm feeling a little scared leading up to this race, even though I've been happy with my training and improvements in endurance and speed. In this week before my race, I have experienced a wide spectrum of moods:

• Exhaustion: Just thinking about packing for this weekend makes me feel like taking a nap. This mood leads nicely into the next mood.

You want me to run HOW FAR??

• Panic: The "Oh, no I'm SO tired right now and I only ran a tiny fraction of my overall race distance today. I AM GOING TO DIE!!"

Nothing says panic like a screaming hamster

• Cranky: Anything that isn't race related is irritating me. Oh, the dishwasher needs to be emptied? TOO BAD, I'm TRYING to get RACE READY HERE!

• Exhilarated: I'm so excited to run this race after all of these months of training and I love the atmosphere at ultras so much and I bet we're all going to hold hands and sing kumbaya at the start line and have S'MORES at the end!

Let's all poop in the woods together!

It's really amazing that my husband hasn't come up with reasons to work late this week. 

I only really need two key things for this race: stupidity and stubbornness. I was stupid enough to sign up and I'm relying on my stubbornness to see me through to the end. :)

Yesterday, it rained all day long, so it was just me, the baby, and my taper crazies all day. We did exciting things like packing up all the toys that Faith has "grown" out of, or more accurately, ignores. The less toys she has out, the more she plays with toys, so I'm trying to streamline our toy situation. See what happens when I taper? I start doing stupid things like attempting to organize the baby's toys. 

It was pouring rain yesterday and taking the baby and the dog out in the rain isn't anyone's favorite, so I did my 5 miles on the treadmill instead. It felt unsatisfying and I still wanted more at the end, just like how I feel when I try to eat an actual serving size of frozen pizza. Hopefully I can bottle this "I want to run more!" feeling and pull it out at mile 45 on Saturday. :)

At this point, I just want Saturday to be here already because the anticipation is killing me. I know you are all as concerned about the weather as me, and it's still looking good for the race (high of 53 and partly sunny). Cross your fingers that it stays that way!

What are you looking forward to this weekend?