We were low on groceries for a dinner on Friday night and because I needed to get a paper good for donation (for a 5K I ran Saturday morning), I took Faith with me to the store. I was feeling uninspired to cook, so I picked up one of these:
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| One of the few things that tastes as good as it smells |
We got home just in time for Faith's dinner time and she ate some of the chicken for her dinner. When she was done, I put the lid back on the chicken and needed to hide it from the dog before I went upstairs to give the kid a bath. The microwave already had butter softening in there (for cookie making), so I slid the chicken into the cool oven.
After the 20 minutes of giving Faith a bath and getting her into her pajamas, we came back downstairs. I had a cornbread mix that I was going to make to go with the chicken, so I pulled it out of the pantry. Step one: preheat oven to 400? Easy!
Guess what I forgot?
After about 7 minutes, I started hearing a strange sizzling out of the oven. Even at that point, I had no idea what could be making that noise. I cracked the oven open and got hit by a big cloud of burning plastic fumes. Did I mention the chicken was still in the plastic grocery bag?
To my husband's credit, he only laughed at me a little bit when I had to call him downstairs and explain what I did. The chicken juice was dripping through the melted plastic container, so I just put a pan underneath it and had to wait until everything cooled off to clean up. Our house smelled just awesome at this point.
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| Oh, this is worse than a dog fart |
My husband should also get credit for knowing that the correct response in this situation is to ask: "Where do you want me to go get food?" A McFlurry always makes me feel better about being incredibly stupid. Public service announcement: the new chicken McBites from McDonald's aren't good. Don't waste your time. Wow, this is like a food blog or something.
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| Yeah, a food blog for people who like horrible food |
Other than almost destroying my oven, I did run a bit over the weekend. On Saturday I met up with 2 of my neighbor friends to run at the ungodly hour of 6:20am. We all have little kids at home and it's just easier sometimes to get the run done earlier so you can be home for the bulk of the day. It was drizzly for our run, but we didn't get drenched and it was 50 degrees, so pretty good conditions for a run. We ran 6.25 miles before heading to a small 5K.
This 5K was organized by a local high school age Girl Scout to raise awareness about homelessness in Calvert County, MD and collect paper goods for the homeless shelter. Our plan was to run before the race, then run the race and then finish off with a little more to make it 12 miles for the day. Well, the race didn't exactly start on time. We had to laugh when it was 5 past the race time and we saw them struggling to take the stop watches out of the plastic packaging. They were still better organized than RAM Racing's Hot Chocolate 15K!
Once we started, the race was good and it was on the normal 5K course on Solomon's Island. It's a small island, so all 5Ks go the same way. I wasn't taking the race seriously and even stopped and used a public bathroom during the race, which is a first for me in a 5K. Also, I think this was the first time I've ever brought a dog into a public bathroom, but that seemed easier than tying her up outside the door. I picked up the pace for about a mile and caught back up with my friends and we finished the race. Well, we assume we finished. There was no finish line, so we just stopped running when it seemed like someone had noticed our presence with the stopwatch. All in all, not too shabby for a race organized and run by a high school girl. I don't think I could do that, even now!
After we finished the 5K, my friends decided they didn't want to finish the 12 for the day and I sure didn't argue. We went to Starbucks instead! A hot chocolate after running in the rain tastes amazing!
I spent some time on Saturday making Faith a new fleece blanket. The one she has now is getting pretty raggedy and I'm always afraid it's going to need an emergency washing in the middle of the night and we don't have a back up. I went to the fabric store and got the stuff to make her a new blanket and at first, she liked it a lot:
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| Mommy, did you really make this? Don't lie to me. |
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| I am SUPER BABY with a FLEECE CAPE! |
She liked the blanket a lot...until I put it in her crib. Oh man, the screaming! She threw it over the edge and screamed until I gave her ratty blanket back. I guess she's going to be one of those kids who drags around a nasty blanket? I'm not going to fight it, but I am I going to steal it and wash it tomorrow when she's not looking.
Today has been really laid back. We didn't go to church because Faith is still dripping from her nose, so we slept in until 7:30am, which was amazing. I ran 6.25 miles at an easy pace on the treadmill...well, for no other reason than I wanted to watch more Buffy. The dog was still exhausted from the run yesterday, so I didn't have to worry about her.
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| What, you didn't think I'd want to run? |
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| This is my sad lip |
Have you ever done anything as stupid as melting plastic in the oven?
This is a very entertaining post! The chicken! The race! The blanket! The dog lip! I laughed, I cried, I commented.
ReplyDeleteI baked a magnet in the oven recently. One of the kids slid it through a crack in the oven door somehow. I didn't notice it till I smelled burning plastic and say saw smoke. My house smelled horrible for a week. I always check the whole oven before I turn it on now.
ReplyDeleteWhen I made cookies last night, it smelled so bad in my house! Luckily, the cookies still tasted good. :)
DeleteI like Faith's new blanket. Pink and green go very well together! The chicken incident sounds very similar to our turkey incident on New Year's Eve minus the fire dept visit.
ReplyDeleteThe fire department's involvement would have been much worse!
DeleteNothing like the smell of burning plastic.....mmmmm. Yes, I do stupid things all the time because now that I'm old I have this problem called CRS. (can't remember shit)
ReplyDeleteI must have CRS too!
DeletePizza box on fire in oven, same reason(keep dog from eating left over pizza). Ugh.
ReplyDeleteMy husband would ask me "why did I do that" and then I'd loose my mind, not the right question.
That is only the right question if the goal is an angry wife. :)
DeleteLol!! This is all awesome... I'll never get the ratty blanket thing - my kid's the same way.
ReplyDeleteAlthough the food talk... Starbucks... making blankets... WHO ARE YOU.
I am constantly doing stupid things. I'm going to pretend you didn't even ask me that question, because I'll be here all night.
Confession: The blanket was actually an "Ages 5 and up" kit...and I still found it a little challenging. :)
DeleteHaha. I once put the cardboard bottom of a frozen pizza into the oven when i was trying to heat it up.
ReplyDeleteMy husband has done that too...at least it doesn't catch on fire!
DeleteOh, gosh- too funny. I can imagine what an awful smell that was, too. I caught fire in the microwave once, which kind of freaked me out since I was home alone with L, but thankfully I was smart enough not to open the door and everything simmered out. I wish L would bond to a blankie... confession, she still loves her paci (only for sleeping). I'm not looking forward to giving that up!
ReplyDeleteAt least the paci is more durable than a blanket! I'm afraid it's going to fall apart every time I wash it.
DeleteI did the super classic milk in the pantry/cereal in the fridge yesterday, which was both awesome and ridiculous at the same time. Sad for me, the milk was pretty bad by the time I got home!
ReplyDeleteOh man, milk in the pantry! That's a classic one!
DeleteOnce upon a time when I was super in love with my husband (read trying to impress him and make him love me even more) I decided to make him lasagna. Well of course it was super gooey, saucy, and cheesy (back in my non vegan days) and was dripping all over the oven. So I grabbed a cookie sheet to put under it. 10 minutes later a blue haze made its way through his apartment. Yeah, that cookie sheet was really an old cafeteria tray - plastic of course it. Winner winner Kier ruined dinner!!
ReplyDeleteNo wonder you became a vegan. :)
DeleteOnce upon a time when I was super in love with my husband (read trying to impress him and make him love me even more) I decided to make him lasagna. Well of course it was super gooey, saucy, and cheesy (back in my non vegan days) and was dripping all over the oven. So I grabbed a cookie sheet to put under it. 10 minutes later a blue haze made its way through his apartment. Yeah, that cookie sheet was really an old cafeteria tray - plastic of course it. Winner winner Kier ruined dinner!!
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time when I was super in love with my husband (read trying to impress him and make him love me even more) I decided to make him lasagna. Well of course it was super gooey, saucy, and cheesy (back in my non vegan days) and was dripping all over the oven. So I grabbed a cookie sheet to put under it. 10 minutes later a blue haze made its way through his apartment. Yeah, that cookie sheet was really an old cafeteria tray - plastic of course it. Winner winner Kier ruined dinner!!
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time when I was super in love with my husband (read trying to impress him and make him love me even more) I decided to make him lasagna. Well of course it was super gooey, saucy, and cheesy (back in my non vegan days) and was dripping all over the oven. So I grabbed a cookie sheet to put under it. 10 minutes later a blue haze made its way through his apartment. Yeah, that cookie sheet was really an old cafeteria tray - plastic of course it. Winner winner Kier ruined dinner!!
ReplyDeleteI do stupid things like that all the time. My poor husband tolerates it so he can laugh at me.
ReplyDeleteProps to the high school kid for being so proactive. She's going places with her life.
Seriously! I was impressed with her idea to have the 5K and I thought it all went pretty well considering no one there seemed to be familiar with racing!
Deleteone time I was cleaning the kitchen and stuck a plastic cutting board in the oven. Because "it seemed like it fit well in there."
ReplyDeletea couple days later Christian was preheating the oven for some frozen pizza. at 500 degrees. After our apartment filled with black acrid smoke and set off the building smoke detectors, I then realized that the cutting board was still in there.
Universe - 1. Emily - negative many points.
So as far as the chicken goes, at least it was APPROPRIATE for it to be in the oven.
I use the oven as a drying rack too! It's amazing I haven't ruined more stuff.
DeleteThat is 100% something I would do. Thanks for the update on the McDonald's chicken bites. I was tempted for a second and thought they could compete with Wendy's nuggets.
ReplyDeleteIt's just all breading and no chicken!
DeleteAfter entertaining my husband by reading this post outloud, I asked "What have I done as stupid as that?" And he said that the list was too long. Most recent? I finished using a glass baking dish in the oven and popped it in the sink, filled it with water immediately where it shattered. It was awesome. I swear it is like they take itty bitty pieces of our brains after we hit 30.
ReplyDeleteYou totally didn't have to rat yourself out that the blanket was a kit. We would never have known.
I felt that I had to provide full disclosure for those who know that I suck at crafty stuff. :)
DeleteThat story gives me hope. Or is indicative of things to come. I'm awful in the kitchen. I love your pictures of Faith. She's get great facial expressions.
ReplyDeleteOh yes, I'm the queen of stupid, especially in the kitchen. I really should have a personal chef. Any idea where I can get one who doesn't charge money?
ReplyDeleteI'm raising Faith to be my personal chef, that'll be free. :)
DeleteThat blanket is adorable! I'm impressed that you made it.
ReplyDeleteI started a legit kitchen fire a few weeks ago. I put a potato in the microwave and must not have poked enough holes in it or something because after a few minutes, it burst into flames. Not like a little sizzle...like flames overtook the microwave. The microwave is still black inside. Oops.
I never knew a potato could do that! Impressive! :)
DeleteAt least Faith got to eat some delicious chicken! Did you get things cleaned up enough to make cookies? Because if you didn't that would have been a true tragedy.
ReplyDeleteMaybe Faith will like the blanket after it's washed and smells like the other one? Can she tell in the dark it's not the same blanket?
Oh and also, why was your husband taking apart your treadmill? You didn't elaborate on that and inquiring minds need to know!
He was trying to recenter the belt, but decided that we needed to probably just hire someone to give it maintenance since I put so many miles on that sucker.
DeleteI tried to add the new blanket to her crib last night and she tolerated it as long as her old ratty one was still there.
I had to postpone my cookie making one night, but it eventually happened!
I could totally see myself doing that exact same thing! My most embarrassing kitchen experience was in college. I helped my husband (then boyfriend) with his dishes in his apartment. I had done dishes before, but I had never actually run the dishwasher before. I stupidly put regular old Dawn dish soap into the detergent dispenser not knowing you're not supposed to do that. I turned it on and headed back to my apartment. He called me half an hour later to tell me his kitchen was flooded with bubbles. I felt like an idiot.
ReplyDeleteThat's a super cute blanket you made for Faith!
I didn't realize it was still in the grocery bag. That makes an even funnier mental picture. As a blogger, you should know that in any emergency, the correct response is to take pictures. I'm quite disappointed not to see your oven about to be destroyed. I think you should email this post to the nameless "Ram Racing Director".
ReplyDeleteI do stuff like that all the time, that sounds pretty mild! I always forget about stuff in the oven - or forget to put things back in the refrigerator. Lately I'm a kick where I forget to shut the car door after I get home. It's happened at least 5 times in the last month - go out in the garage and the driver's side door is still open.
ReplyDeleteI had a comment for this, but got distracted. So now I'm just going to go with: This is why I don't eat meat.
ReplyDeleteI've baked a cardboard pizza box with leftover pizza in it more than once!
ReplyDeleteI see that Faith's starting to sport a respectable little ponytail on the top of her head now! :-) She's looking soooo much older in these photos for some reason!
OH NO!!!! I hope your oven is okay!!
ReplyDeleteI did laugh at your plight so I hope that doesn't make me a bad person.
My dog does the sad lip too. Cracks me up every time.
That is totally something I would do (have done?). Your husband is awesome for offering to pick up something for dinner; my husband would still be laughing. :)
ReplyDeleteI would totally do something like that! Wow, preggo brain - I couldn't think of "something like that" and tried to type something of that sort of nature. Seriously, it's that bad.
ReplyDeleteEveryone has done the use the oven for storage only to regret it later routine. I baked a pan fill of cookies with a plastic lid. At least most of the plastic went into the pan. It smelled terrible!
ReplyDeleteNice weekend of running. I love how you string your miles together. Less stress is always good.
We just moved into our brand new house and I cranked on the oven, probably to make frozen pizza or something, and then we smelt the burning. The instructions were in there smoking away. Of course they were plastic wrapped. Took forever to get the stink out.
ReplyDeleteI can picture Faith throwing the blanket out of the crib in a fit of screaming rage. :) Mostly because I see this happen on a weekly basis with the simple substitution of blanket with food, and crib with high chair.
ReplyDeleteAs for oven disasters, I once used wax paper instead of parchment paper and set off all 3 fire alarms in our old apartment. The hubby laughed at me after the scolding.
I hate it when I do stupid things like that! oops
ReplyDeleteI just made my kids new fleece blankets for Christmas and when it comes down to it they would prefer to have their old ratty ones too.
I think I've run a 5K or two that was a bit crazy like that :)
ReplyDeleteAND ratty blankets run in my house. I was a ratty blanket lover and so was my daughter. My son is a ratty stuffed animal owner. It just smells gross.
This weekend I simmered water, lemon slices, fresh rosemary, and vanilla to make the house smell good. But then I forgot about it completely, all the water evaporated, and everything burned to the pan. I think the pan is salvageable but I haven't given it a final scrub yet.
ReplyDeleteAlso last week I bought chocolate protein powder and got halfway home (store is 30 min away) before I realized that I got WHEY protein powder. I do not eat dairy. I don't know what I was thinking. I planned to return it but then the next day I looked at the receipt, thought "there's no reason to keep this," and threw it out. So now I'm stuck with it. D'oh!
i'm a nightmare in the kitchen. a few years ago i decided to make red velvet cupcakes (not sure why since i never, ever bake). i was having trouble mixing everything together and the mix was flying everywhere. my nose started running and i went to get a tissue and started screaming that my nose was bleeding to my husband. the tissue was all red. he started laughing hyserically and told me that cupcake mix was coming out my nose since i inhaled so much of it. opps. i had no idea. that damn mix was a pain in the ass to get out of my nose and my kitchen! do you feel better now?
ReplyDeleteI put a birthday cake & matching cupcakes (wiht candles) in the oven to keep them safe from frosting swipers & preheated them to death. TWICE
ReplyDeleteI know this is late but I had to comment on this post because I recently put a book in the broiler. Yes. I don't know what possessed me either, but I was making paninis and wanted to "weigh them down." My husband honestly just laughed and "went for a walk" after putting the fire out. Probably the dumbest thing I've ever done, and I've done a lot of dumb things.
ReplyDeleteI melted a bowl of popcorn in a friend's oven. Very stinky and embarrassing. I don't know why it was in there.
ReplyDeleteI will never forget the day when my grandmother put an ice cream cake in the microwave for 10minutes instead of 10 seconds.
ReplyDeleteThe facial expressions of Faith never cease to amuse me!
ReplyDeleteI melted my brother's highchair tray when I was a teen by setting it on the still-hot stovetop. Brilliant.