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| SCHOOL IS SO FUN! |
This morning Faith started crying as soon as I pulled her lunch bag out of the fridge and then wailed the entire drive to the school. When she realized we were in the parking lot, she jacked it up a notch and even got the attention of people in nearby parked cars with her volume level. Once I dragged her and her various luggage (you'd think she was staying there for a week by how much stuff I have to bring for her) inside, she stopped crying. Then she saw her favorite caregiver and I handed her off and she didn't even look back or shed a single tear.
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| Mommy who? |
Verdict: Faker! She seems to just hate the idea of school now and has a great time when she's there. I mean, she got to make this masterpiece today:
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| She's obviously a genius |
She also learned how to play football today in Jump Bunch. I'm just taking their word for that, but I don't remember giving them clearance to make her potentially more destructive at home. I see bruises in my future.
School was so exciting that Faith decided to skip taking a nap there, so I had to try to get her to take one when we got home. I'm glad I had already ran (5 whole miles, gold star for me) because it wasn't easy to get her to go to sleep and I had to keep going upstairs to tell her to stop jumping on her bed. Even after I finally got her to nap, this was pretty much her mood for the rest of the day:
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| ANGRY BUNNY JUDGES YOU |
It's a good thing my husband is around to provide comic relief after a difficult bedtime routine. This is what I found waiting for me when I came back downstairs:
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| The penguin likes to watch |
Do you think making stuffed animals do stuff like this is hilarious or just stupid? I obviously think it's hilarious and used to do it to coworkers who had stuffed animals on their desk. How could I resist?
your husband is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteHe really is, that's why his twitter is better than mine.
Deleteand your daughter makes the best "I'm going to kill you in your sleep" stare.
ReplyDeleteShe makes me proud.
DeleteThe polar bear clearly had it coming. I don't have to do that with stuffed animals because I can watch Delilah hump Rufus all day long. She's got issues.
ReplyDeleteI love that your female dog is the rapist in the family.
DeleteThat's awesome. Did you see last week's Modern Family? There was elephant/monkey rape going on. Pretty funny stuff! Faith looks possessed.
ReplyDeleteI do find that sort of thing somewhat funny, though I get uncomfortable that they are my children's toys, and I want to keep things as innocent as possible for as long as possible. That's why I stick to just taking pictures of myself in those situations.
ReplyDeleteI kid!
It's only ruining innocence if you make the sound effects too.
Deleteumm, hilarious. that's something i would do myself.
ReplyDeletePut a lightning bolt shirt on elmo and suddenly he acts like a rock star...
ReplyDelete(genuinely laughed out loud about the penguin)
I heard Elmo has a bear in every port.
Deletesnickering to myself as I read this on the couch. funny stuff right there. the penguin comment was the best though. lol
ReplyDeleteOK, I thought the rednecks in the swamped aisle photo was the best, but the angry Faith bunny one is now the winner.
ReplyDeleteNo humping stuffed animals here, but my dad used to make male genitalia in the grocery store out of a banana and two kiwis.
I'd love to go grocery shopping with your dad, that is CLASSIC.
DeleteOMG! I needed this laugh! Thank you so much!
ReplyDeleteHilarious. Do you watch Tosh.0? I laughed my ass off last week when he was fucking Miss Piggy with Kermit jacking off in the corner. Seriously. Hilarious.
ReplyDeleteWe love that show! I always knew Miss Piggy was a slut.
DeleteAnybody with stuffed animals on their work desk is asking for this sort of tom-foolery.
ReplyDeleteThat's my general opinion too :)
DeleteMy husband has his own Muppet. It's done truly, truly horrible things to our dogs...
ReplyDeleteWhat I think is that all this time I've been feeling sorry for him. Now I realize you're a match made in heaven.
ReplyDeleteI think he might still be deserving of your sympathy :)
DeleteBy the way, I did once see a real dog making improper advances to a Tigger stuffed animal. That was pretty amusing.
DeleteI don't have to play with stuffed toys to get that kind of action. My dogs are happy to provide a fully animated version. Particularly when we have guests.
ReplyDeleteFaith's stink-eye is awesome, especially in the bunny outfit. I'm sure it will only get better as she becomes a teenager too.
ReplyDeleteGrown ups who keep stuffed animals at their desk are just asking for it. Who does that?
I don't know, but Beanie Babies can be molded into hilarious scenarios.
DeleteTHat is something my husband does too. It cracks me up finding things like that around the house and random times.
ReplyDeleteKids have things more figured out than we give them credit for. They really know how to work us.
It's definitely hilarious. You should do it all the time before Faith "gets" it.
ReplyDeleteI used to bawl my eyes out before going to pre school too. I liked it once I was there, but it was so sad to leave home.
OMG your husband is hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI've recently starting asking Owen "Are you faking" when he cries. I can totally tell when it's fake, but he's actually quite good. He's not smart enough to lie to me yet, so he says "Yes" through his [fake] tears.
ReplyDeleteCracks me up.
Angry Bunny face is terrifying.
ReplyDeleteNow I think your husband might be funnier than you. And yes, kids were put on this earth to make us go senile faster. My 8 year old wants to be a pimp for Halloween. Delightful.
ReplyDeleteIs Faith's angry bunny face in terror of what Elmo is doing to her polar bear? :)
ReplyDeleteFaith has a very good stink eye. She and the B should get together and have a stink-eye-off. My husband once put my underwear (clean of course) and bra on a stuffed animal. He has stopped doing stuff like that since we had the kid. Don't tell him, but I miss it sometimes ha!
ReplyDeleteWhat's the age limit for this blog?
ReplyDeleteOoooh, what about "Most Likely to Pee Self" category?
ReplyDeleteYou really need to tone it down with funny stuff your husband does. General consensus on this post's comments seem to be that he's funnier than you.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Chinese women don't think it's funny when you put their Hello Kitty collection into compromising positions with other stuffed animals and then say it's an orgy. Trust me on this one.
Kids are so good at that. I used to work with 2 year-olds as the lead teacher and the kids stopped crying as soon as the parents left. They learn how to manipulate really early:) Love the stuffed animal poses. Just what you need:)
ReplyDeleteOrgasmic Elmo made my whole night.
ReplyDeleteWhat sort of weirdos did you work with who had stuffed animals on their desk? I work in an elementary school and have never heard of this. At one time I probably would have found it funny but after years of living with Eric it's just the status quo. I totally thought that "Pet Paradise" magnet was a sticker they put on her picture and figured that "Pet Paradise" and "school" were some sort of one stop shop.
ReplyDeleteIt's pretty funny that from one day in the future, this post now looks very tame. No vomit or tampon or poop.
ReplyDeleteSo....
ReplyDeleteOne of your kids eats lots of food.
One of your kids eats lots of poop.
I can hardly wait to hear what the next kid eats.
And then the twins.
And then the triplets.
I just stumbled upon your blog and between this and the poop eating dog, I don't think I have laughed this hard in a while! And yes, my husband has arranged toys like that for me to find....when my kids were really little, my older son (yes, son) found this Barbie at a garage sale that he had to have. Unfortunately, she was sold in only a red tank top. I found her in our dollhouse on all fours nd my husband had the father doll of the dollhouse behind her with his hand up to spank her.
ReplyDelete