Thursday, September 5, 2013

A whore is a whore is a whore

Normally, I don't read preachy, sanctimonious blogs that tell me how to raise my children, but when I see more than one person post something on Facebook with the caption "Right on!" and "Fantastic article!", I tend to click over and read. The post in question was written as a letter to teenage girls (the whole group as a homogeneous whorish whole). Let's walk through this train wreck ok?

Last night, as we sometimes do, our family sat around the dining-room table and looked through your social media photos.

Wait, what? You sit around your table and look at social media photos as a family? Is that your dinner time conversation? "Well, it looks like Kendall has been enjoying her mother's cooking a little too much. I guess you won't be asking her to homecoming, huh son?" I guess asking each other to talk about their days is boring compared to combing through Facebook and Instagram for pictures of braless teenage girls.

Let's keep going because we don't want to overlook this gem:

I know your family would not be thrilled at the thought of my teenage boys seeing you only in your towel. Did you know that once a male sees you in a state of undress, he can’t ever un-see it?  You don’t want the Hall boys to only think of you in this sexual way, do you?

Ladies, did you know that this "male species", when allowed to roam freely, is unable to control itself and exists in an animal-like state of testosterone fueled lust?

That's not the best part of all of this, the BEST part is that this post is illustrated by pictures of her boys at the beach....shirtless. Well, damn it now girls can only see them in a sexual way. That's too bad because normally teenagers really avoid thinking about sex.





The letter post concludes with a heavy warning to girls of the potential of being forever blocked from the Hall family if they dare to post a "sexy selfie" which I'm led to believe requires duck face and limited undergarments. She implores the teenage girls to rush to their accounts and remove any pictures that could make male friends imagine them naked in their bedrooms. Yeah sure, like that will save them.




Here's a revolutionary thought: why don't you just raise your sons to be decent human beings and not require half of the human population to cover up to "protect their character"? No female, not even the ones who are "asking for it" with their clothing or demeanor, is responsible for a man's actions or impure thoughts.

I find it fascinating that this kind of blogger (the self righteous Christian hyper-focused on purity kind) usually also demeans Islam as a religion, even though they are preaching the same message. Women, cover yourselves! Do not tempt the men with your sultry hair and wear loose clothing that obscures your figure so not to distract the men with thoughts of sex. Hey, why we're at it, let's make a woman's accusation of rape only stand if she has four unrelated male witness willing to testify on her behalf! We all know a woman's word doesn't carry the same weight and she was probably asking for it anyway. Did you see that most recent selfie she posted on Facebook??

Ugh, what a whore

As my two daughters grow up, they will know that they aren't responsible for anyone else's purity or commitment to chastity. They won't be doing any oddly creepy Father-Daughter Purity ring exchanges and they won't be raised believing that they are born impure because of Eve's sin in the Garden.

For their sake's, I hope they never fall in love with any guy with a mom like that lady who wrote that horrible letter. There are bad mothers in law, and then there is one who is already praying for the purity of her future daughter in law...while her boys are still children. Good luck living up to that one ladies. Don't worry though, there is a loophole.




To everyone out there who does hope to control the amount of time their teenagers spend thinking about sex, uh....good luck with that? I'm sure censorship will totally solve your problem.


What are your opinions on this? You're allowed to disagree with me, no fines will be applied and unlike the author of the original post, I don't moderate or delete comments so go wild.

81 comments:

  1. maybe you should tell your daughters to be married to god, and that abstinence is totally the right answer. It works for Catholic priests, right?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A rabbi and a Catholic priest are running out of a burning building. The priest stops and says "Wait, what about the children?" and the rabbi replies "Fuck them!"

      The priest says "Do we have time?"

      Delete
    2. oh my. that is so bad, it's good. lol

      Delete
  2. I have always failed to see how it is my responsibility to act/do/wear/be a certain thing to prevent/encourage someone to act/do/think/be another certain thing.

    How about "raise your children to respect themselves and other people" instead? That how someone presents themselves does not necessarily entitle you to treat them with disrespect? Doesn't that seem like a more effective strategy?

    This article makes me want to punch things. I suppose if her sons get charged with rape, it will be because the girl asked for it...or because his penis magically fell into her vagina. Because, physics.

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    Replies
    1. Don't worry, her body will shut down if it's a legitimate rape.

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  3. I feel like men and boys should be more insulted by this post than women should. Sure, you can tell us to cover up (and we may or may not listen) but that is far less offensive than assuming that men and teenaged boys have no control over their actions. True - teenagers have little control over the fact that thinking about sex happens about once a second, but most of them are at least able to control their behaviours (sweatpants erections not included...those just happen...)

    I haven't read the post and I don't plan to because I don't want to give her page views just in case she has advertisers. But she sounds like a piece of work.

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  4. I read that post as well, and kinda thought the same thing. "The Hall family is going to delete you" like that was some major punishment. Weird. I think maybe the idea behind her post was good-- girls, you don't have to be half naked for people to like you--but she wrote it in such a We-are-so-much-better-than-you way that the nice message was lost.

    It really pisses me off how when boys end up thinking about sex, it's a girls fault for making him.

    How about you teach your boys not to be pigs, k?

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    1. I was going to comment, but am lazy and pretty much agree with everything you said, so ditto.

      Also - I will probably love any post that includes Garfunkel and Oates.

      Delete
  5. THANK YOU for saying something. I read that post and it really rubbed me the wrong way and I COULD NOT believe I am friends with people on Facebook who would share that nonsense and actually agree with it. I feel like I can't get my thoughts on this out eloquently enough, so you said everything better than I could. I believe in raising our sons to respect women for who they are and not as beings that exist for their sexual arousal.

    I just can't with the people in this world sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm seriously questioning the reading comprehension or intelligence level of some of my Facebook friends.

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    2. That is the worst part of these blogs, when I see people I otherwise like commenting on them and saying "right on!" Ugh, no.

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  6. I have three sons and expect the teen years to be FULL of fun. I will teach them to be respectful of women, but I'm not going to blame a girl if a pair of booty shorts gets a head turn from one of my sons. It wouldn't make him a bad person either for looking. It's all of part of growing up.

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    1. Hell, I look if a hot chick in booty shorts walks by. We all do. Even the dog looks.

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    2. I'd look too. We're all such whores.

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    3. Yup. Me and my dog. Ha!

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  7. Completely agree. The more I see people post this on Facebook with an "Amen!!" comment, the more infuriated I become.

    If her boys are lusting after these girls, well it's their fault for being sluts. Nice, lady.

    And ooooooooo noooooo, you're going to delete them?! Block them forever?! But what will they doooooo??? Jesus.

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    1. The last part of this comment made me actually laugh out loud. Well done :)

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    2. Haha! Score! Also, those daddy-daughter purity ring ceremony things really creep the hell out of me. YIKES.

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  8. Oh wow that video hahaha.
    I was seriously shocked at the number of people I saw linking to this post like it was a good thing. I get encouraging teens to be mindful of what kind of stupid stuff they post online. But that post gave me the weirds and it seems like the author is the kind of mom that would be like "Well, she was dressed like a slut so she kind of deserved it. My teen boy never has thought about sex until he saw her dressed inappropriately and I've made sure of it because we discuss it as a family. EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT." Creepfest.

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    Replies
    1. I would chew my own arm off before I'd sit at that family table for those conversations.

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  9. These are the type of children that grow up thinking that just laying next to someone in bed is "sleeping with them" and will produce children and then go to Bob Jones University. Then some poor professor will be brought in for fertility counseling and have to explain the birds and the bees to them. That is sadly not even an exaggeration. Those people exist.

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  10. I like that you responded to this.
    I think that mom is probably a good mom. She wants what's best for her boys, even if she's misguided. I think being involved with your kids activity on social media is good, but to delete someone based on it appearing too sexy is pretty lame. Girls pose in their bathing suits all summer long, yet when they cover up in a towel (where you can't see their midsection and whether they wax or not), suddenly it's too suggestive? Oh, you're naked under that towel? My mind is spiraling into the gutter.
    And honestly, if she wants to have those conversations with her boys and have the rules about instagram that she has, fine. But it's the self righteous approach that is no good.

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    1. She's probably a super mom. I'm sure if she died that her sons would keep her body in their family motel and still have conversations with her about the whores who come stay in the hotel and dare to take showers.

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  11. I haven't read the whole post because I don't want to click over to her site, but I've read enough bits and pieces to be offended.

    Maybe that girl was wearing something "inappropriate", but guess what? It's none of her business. That is the girl's parents' business. Instead of spending so much time trying to correct a teenage girl whom she is not the parent of, why doesn't she spend some teaching her own children about what's inappropriate and respecting others and their choices. And I learned in my many years of spending time with teenage boys that it really doesn't matter how you are dressed, they are still probably thinking about sex.

    One other thing I think is really funny about this is she points out that the girl was bra-less. Um, did you point this out to your sons? Because I'm sure they didn't say it. Of course, I haven't seen the offensive picture but I'm my mind I'm guessing it is a teenage girl in a tank top with a built-in bra. Throughout high school and college I had friends that would wear those under their shirts and not wear a regular bra because they could. Which just makes this post seem funny.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I go out with a bra all the time. I'm basically a Jezebel.

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    2. I only braless if I can mostly be in a horizontal position. But that's just because I would like my boobs to still be above my belly button in ten years.

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    3. I only braless if I can mostly be in a horizontal position. But that's just because I would like my boobs to still be above my belly button in ten years.

      Delete
    4. I'd make fun of you for posting twice, but it's about boobs.

      Delete
  12. I wouldn't want my kids to grow up ashamed of their sexuality and would instead want them to be educated, aware and respectful.

    Sex was a taboo subject with my parents. I guess it still is. My 27 year old sister moved in with her boyfriend this spring and my parents asked her the other day if she is 'using protection'. That is the first time they've asked her that. I will NOT be that parent.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. One of my FB friends just posted this: http://natepyle.com/seeing-a-woman/

      Delete
  13. I think you should post a link to the video in her comments. She will delete it, but her head might explode in the process.

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  14. Ack! I am upset that I can't watch the loophole video since I am at work. I wonder if the blogger in question would feel differently if she had some daughters.

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  15. I told my daughter I would take her phone, etc. away if she posts inappropriate pictures. I am embarrassed for girls/women who feel the need to accidentally post a cleavage/boob/bikini shot. "I'm so bored, I need attention." Respect yourself first.

    When she is 18 she can choose how she wants to portray herself on social media. But, while I'm paying for the phone, there will be boundaries. Social media allows people to get emotionally close with minimal effort.

    I think boys should be held just as accountable. The article you mentioned is a great discussion piece, no matter how you feel about how the author presented her "side".

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    1. I would absolutely punish my kids. What my kids do is my business...at least until they pay their own bills :) I think the author of the other post lost her audience when she started trying to punish other people's children.

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  16. I read that post and it made my blood boil. And then like 10 people I know posted it on FB praising it. FFS!!!

    Teenage boys think about sex. Period. She is fooling herself if she thinks differently.

    I honestly have no idea how I will handle my kids social media accounts when they get older. I hope they will understand that they don't need to take/post/send naked pictures of themselves to be accepted. Or to do some of the stupid things I see boys AND girls do, but I KNOW I won't be posting my "wisdom" about it on the internet. So effing pretentious.Gah!

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  17. Ew! This post (hers not yours!) left a bad, bad taste in my mouth. So glad the commenters are calling her out for posting the pictures of the boys in swimsuits.

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  18. I can't believe that post hasn't made its way into my Facebook feed ... yet. When it does, I can't wait to share yours as a response piece to every "Atta girl"er who posts it.

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  19. This is nuts. I do believe in watching what you post on FB (there's always someone who'll judge you for it, and since I'm working these days, I don't want any potential employers to look at my photos and think I'm a screw-off), but going through someone's FB photos with your teenage sons? Making it Family Judging Time? That's a little . . . uh . . . creepy.

    I say this as a pretty serious Christian, too. Raised Catholic, confirmed Catholic, family doesn't eat meat on Fridays, etcetera. But we never, ever thought of doing anything like this. This woman is trying to micromanage the entire world to prevent her sons from having sexual thoughts! Paging Dr. Freud.

    Also, let those who are without sin cast the first stone. Doesn't she consider that posting shirtless photos of her sons could tempt some good girl to sin? Tsk tsk.

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  20. I'm going to go back to see if anyone I know posted that. Or maybe I should just stay ignorant.....

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  21. One thing I wish I could unsee: the comments on that post...

    wow.

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  22. Like I needed another reason to love your blog.

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  23. This is fascinating. I obviously do not have kids, much less ones with social media accounts, so this comes with a grain of salt.

    On one hand, I admire what she is trying (key word, trying) to do in raising her own kids. She's trying to teach them not to objectify women, not to look at them in states of undress if they are not in that sort of intimate relationship. That's ok...I admit, I don't LIKE that my husband peruses women on the Chive. I love him, trust him and recognize that the Chive is really.freaking.funny. But that doesn't mean I have to like that aspect of it. However, unlike this woman, I can dislike something and not censor it. ;)

    Teaching teenage boys abstinence won't work. At all. Ever. Taking away pretty women will never stop them from thinking about their female friends in a sexual way.

    And I HATE that she puts this on those girls. That is an issue for those girls' parents to work through, however they see fit. Teach your kids to be moral, upstanding gentlemen and then women won't have to hide.

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    1. I feel like she is objectifying women in her thinking. Mess up once? WORTHLESS TRASH. No longer a person and forever dead to the Hall family!

      Delete
  24. OMG! Is that little dark haired Catholic slut cheating on Raj Koothrapali?

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    1. It's not cheating if you use the loophole.

      Delete
  25. You were taken off my reader due to your daughters' sultry embrace in your website header. The Hall's NEED their chastity belts for reasons like your website.

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    Replies
    1. And those tight running pants you wear...how are the men supposed to control themselves?!

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    2. The pants are a training tool so I can learn to be faster than rapists.

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  26. You know, the way Cordelia looks at the camera makes very uncomfortable. She needs to quit pouting her lips so much. Please quit teaching your children your whorish ways.

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  27. I'm like Ashley, I don't have kids so I never thought about it. That blogger seems to think that it is the ultimate goal of every girl in town to secure the friendship of the Hall family. It definitely depresses me that I see girls already feeling like they have to look and act sexy at age 9, but I definitely agree with your point that they don't owe it to anyone to cover up or posting sexy selfies is asking for it or something.

    I am jealous of their family social media dinner table events. We are far away and forced to resort to screen shots and texts.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Little girl clothing can be disturbing. If you're in the "girls" section, none of the shirts need to say "Hot Stuff" across the chest.

      Delete
  28. This woman is in for a rude awakening. I feel like kids that grow up in these bubble-like houses don't fare as well as kids who have parents that are a little looser on the rules.

    It doesn't help that the tone I read her post in is that of someone that's gone bat shit bananas.

    I'm also thankful there wasn't any poop stories in this post! :)

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    Replies
    1. You just know she's going to send those boys to some Bible college with ridiculous rules to keep insulating them from the evil real world.

      Delete
  29. Using shame to teach a child about sexual morality is a great way to raise a child who is terrified of sex. Or this guy: http://starcasm.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/The_Virgin_Diaries_kiss_animated_gif.gif

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    1. OMG that is something I can never unsee

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  30. I saw this posted in response on Facebook, and liked it a lot. http://putdowntheurinalcake.com/2013/09/dear-mrs-hall-regarding-your-fyi-if-youre-a-teenage-girl/ (Plus LOOK AT THAT BLOG NAME. WINNING!)

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    Replies
    1. That is an epic blog name! Her post is so much more thoughtful and well written than mine lol. But mine had gifs!

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  31. Great now I have to go read the post!

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  32. My first thought about this post is does she think that a teenage boy has to see a scantily clad lady to imagine her scantily clad? Those images just pop into their heads naturally. No pics needed. I agree that teenage girls don't need to post sexy pics like that, but that's not her job to berate them online about it. Also weird that they sit around the dinner table and look at social media:/

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    Replies
    1. Exactly, it's the parents of the teenage girl's problem to micromanage them, not Mrs. Hall.

      Delete
  33. I'm to lazy to see if someone shared this with you or not. But when I read it I thought of this post. I like this one much better

    http://natepyle.com/seeing-a-woman/

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  34. My mother told me that all men were animals and, surprisingly, she's a devout Christian woman. We weren't allowed to wear bikinis growing up (because the sight of our podgy, white bellies were going to drive men into an irresistible, uncontrollable lust) or have our ears pierced (because only sluts do that). Even kissing meant the threat of pregnancy.

    I can't stand all that preachy condemnation stuff - I've had way too many years of it.

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  35. I saw this on GOMI earlier today and I honestly just wanted to throw up, how on earth do people share that like its a good thing! umm lady whats it feel like to be a freaking hypocrite!

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  36. What I find so obnoxious about the whole thing -- beyond message, which is both abhorrent and ridiculous -- is that the people who are posting it on my FB feed, praising it, are the same people who four, five, six years ago were posting "sexy selfies" on the internet. Or running around college half-dressed and intoxicated. (Something the Hall boys will likely do when they get out from under the thumb of Mrs. Hall).

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  37. I read this after seeing it linked on facebook too and it made me SO RAGEY. The weirdest part was that in-between each paragraph she had her sons shirtless on the beach. How is that any fucking different? UGH.

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  38. Ugh...I want to barf. I have a 15 year old son and yup, when I tuck him in at night, we no longer read bed time stories. Instead, we anxiously scroll through all the Instagram selfies of scantily clad teenage girls. I am hoping I can pick out the perfect girl for him!

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    Oh geez...Whatever Mrs. Hall!!!
    Without any prompting on my part, my son thinks those girls are ridiculous for their bikini shots and bedroom poses. Hey! I never taught him that those things were really not all that appropriate, but somehow he GETS IT!
    My son respects himself. He has his testosterone filled body in check.
    Hmmm...maybe I've done something right.
    One thing I can be sure of, my son isn't going to be the one sneaking around and looking at porn on the net and trying to get a glimpse of a little cleavage. However, I think Mrs. Hall may need to worry about that.
    Make something forbidden and that makes it all the more appealing.
    Ok, maybe my son will sneak some porn pics.
    Wow, maybe like the Hall's...we can do it together!
    HAHA!
    #neverhappen
    #mrhallclearlysneaksporn

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  39. Love your blog and thought you might appreciate this response to the "slutshaming" trend: http://www.theweeklings.com/wcollins/2013/09/07/the-slutshaming-trend-an-open-letter/

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  40. mrs hall comes across as self righteous and preachy, but i know where she is coming from (im a christian). girls these days seem to think that any attention is good attention (wrong). i know ill be teaching my daughter how to dress modestly and also respect herself and others. anyways, just my 2 cents.

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    Replies
    1. If she had phrased it as how she plans on raising her daughter, my reaction would have been different. Her letter was addressed to the teenage girls of the world...who aren't her kids and she really shouldn't be trying to parent (shame?) them.

      Delete
  41. Hey I've been reading (and loving!) your blog for a while but this is the first time I've commented, mainly just to say hells yeah to your response. That woman's open letter is ridiculous on so many counts. Does she really think that her teenage boys will suddenly stop thinking about sex if they no longer see girls in bikinis on Instagram?

    And also I just wanted to make the point that I'm tired of these people acting like it's the worst thing in the world for a person to look at someone and think about sex. It's actually kind of what we do, you know, seeing as though we are animals who reproduce sexually. The problem comes when you treat a person as less-than simply because you thought about sex with them, and that is clearly a message Ms. Hall has no interest in teaching (or learning herself, apparently).

    Anyways, thanks for being such a hilarious and kick-ass blogger. I shall now retreat back into the darkness where I will continue lurking.

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    Replies
    1. That's a good point about the sexual nature of being a human. It's not something you can just shut off! You can only control how you respond to it and that's what judgy bloggers like Mrs.Hall should focus on: raising her kids to not be assholes. That should be everyone's parenting goal :)

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